Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Goodbye Cruel World

I was fired from life today during lunch. You may wonder what horrible offense I have committed to be removed from the land of the living.(Even if you don't you are going to find out)

Was it my unquenchable desire to share every remotely humorous story with everyone I meet...no.

Was it because of jealousy of my perfectly sharp and able mind? Sadly no.

Is it an incurable case of phung :-)? Nope.

Apparently not liking salt was enough to do it. To come back I will have to take a journey through bat country. During my journey through bat country I will meet C. Dick and I will watch him run. Then I will surely meet up with Roland Doobie and spend some quality time with him while he makes me draw portraits of my thumbs. Only to cap off my journey at Sammy's Salty Shack, where I will be forced to eat salt until I like it. It should make for a strange and terrible journey full of ironic torments and sardonic witticisms.

Wish me luck,

I am Ahab.

2 comments:

Kimma said...

There is nothing wrong with an incurable case of Phung! :)

Anonymous said...

There is an idea of a Bat Country; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable... I simply am not there. - P.B.

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