Ok it isn't often I take requests for blog posts, but this one was interesting.
The pros of being a zombie:
-You may smell but your friends like it.
-Everyone you know is hungry all the time.
-No one can tell your drunk shuffle from the regular shuffle
-You always go to the bathroom together... and really everywhere else together too. Safety in numbers.
-You will never be judged for a bad hair day
-Dirt under the fingernails is all the rage
-If someone messes with you, your friends will eat their brain
-You will never be expected to run anywhere
-You don't remember why the third floor is funny but you still want to go there
-Your friends will never make you read Eat Pray Love... or anything. They are so over reading
-No longer have a reason to fear stalkerish, sparkly bompires
<3 you guys!
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About Me
- Liz Schulte's Blog
- I am a Scorpio. I enjoy long walks on the beach, drinking copious amounts of alcohol, and men in hockey masks. In my spare time I work to foil the plans of my arch nemesis, utilize my eight finger discount, and lecture from my soapbox about social injustices. I do not tolerate fools or like people who make Walmart plural. I judge people who are missing more teeth than they have, unless they are old. I would like to someday be the scary old woman in the neighborhood that all the children are afraid of, however I will be misunderstood and actually a sweet old lady turned bitter by the disappointments of this cruel, cruel life. I will have made my vast wealth telling fortunes under the alias the Mad Madame Mim and selling t-shirts in tourist destinations that say “Life isn’t always flowers and sausages”.
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